What is it that I seek? at times I wish for solitude, to be in my own contempt and succumb to my pain and misery as I Always faced them being used to a lonely life....yet there was always a picture of happiness playing endlessly in my mind, to one day seek it...yet I feared if it would last. Then what is it again that I seek?...in a state of confusion as I am, my answer is still buried deep. Yes, there are such emotions as love and hate, yet for one my hate grew deeper as my love grew thinner because I have been betrayed by that very 'Love'....so is fear my strongest emotion then? Have I grown to fear the very name of love itself? or is it that I have consumed my fear and driven my anger? a question neither can answer.... There were a few who gave me hope of happiness....of love, to conquer my fear and start fresh...some I declined yet a few I foolishly accepted that has only lead to deeper feeling of guilt and failure for I have forgotten how to love....I have forgotten the joy I once had to love someone deeply. My life has took an un-explainable turn towards my career and my lust for fame that I have forsaken the thought of Love but diverted my sight for joy through friends. I guess humans are like that, we want to live by each others happiness but not each others misery. We don't want to despise one another as the world is already full of hatred and greed. is it that the world has lost its beauty, or have I just lost the beauty of life...i do not know. My answers might lie before me....Yet I ask my self again, "What is it that I seek?"
...Yoga...
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