Wednesday, 3 September 2014

Number 1 - Numerology

The Number one is Ruled by the Planet SUN. Among all the numerlogical number the 1 is the
first to arrive therefore the leader of all numbers, All other numbers lack the leadership therefore the 1 is expressed to be born leaders for being truly strong and dominating. The 1 is a doer, a powerful force that produces results and does not allow anything or anyone to limit its potential. The 1 is aggressive, a necessary energy for creating and producing. The 1 is always in the forefront: a spear-point directing and leading others. The shape of the number 1, just like the shape of all other symbols, reflects its meaning; it walks upright with pride and purpose. Strong, determined, unwavering and with specific goals in mind, the 1 can turn dreams and ideas into reality. It pushes obstacles aside or simply drills right through them. 

The 1 are comfortable spending hours alone in their thoughts and rarely get bored and rather be alone then to suffer small talk, the 1 loves deeply but if betrayed it is next to impossible to forgive them. All the 1 craves is to reach the highest of order and the chance to focus their attention on a meaningful existence and if anything comes in their way will be crushed without mercy let it be their family or lover.
The 1 grows, transforms and improves in perpetuity, precisely the way Mother Nature does. After all, nature's primal force and most basic building block is the number 1. Nature knows no mercy and its cruelty can be heartbreaking. However, it knows balance and gives life indiscriminately and without judgment. The number 1 has a similar built-in perfection and balance; you can force a change here or there, but negative repercussions are likely.
The 1 tends to have a simple, straightforward view of life and its many complexities. It trusts its own ability to separate right from wrong. It doesn't waste time on abstract ideas or anything else that isn't in line with its pursuit of results. The 1 is no  philosopher and certainly no spiritual explorer. It is a pragmatist, a ruthless conqueror and a warrior extraordinaire. It is individualistic and independent to a fault. It will attempt to force its values and opinions on you but it won't accept, or even listen to, yours.
The 1 does not hesitate when it senses a need for confrontation. It is extremely stubborn, but also courageous and willing to try anything new if it sees promise, even at great danger. It is, if you haven't guessed, the most wisest of all numbers. There is a certain quality, a sense of honor and responsibility that demands our respect, and it has a sense of justice that cannot be denied. The number 1 cannot witness injustice without jumping in and setting things straight.
Its purity of purpose is an admirable quality of the number 1. It sees things for what they are and hypocrisy or superficial doesn't stand a chance. Befriend a 1 and you have a friend for life. You can poke fun at a 1 and not have to worry about hurt feelings. A 1 has a great capacity for humor, including the self-deprecating kind. If, however, you try to cater to a 1 to win its love or friendship, you'll lose its respect instead. Stand up to a 1 and you may lose the fight, but you'll gain its admiration. If you are in trouble and need help, the number 1 is who you want on your side -- there is no more dedicated protector or braver partner. If you are in love, the number 1 is the most difficult of all lovers: demanding, confrontational, impatient and they focus mainly on their goals then their relationship. If you find yourself in the service of a 1, you will be pushed to the limit, abused at all hours, and incapable of living up to its expectations. But you will also, without a doubt, become the best you could ever be. If the 1 is your enemy, you will be crushed ruthlessly without mercy.
If you yourself are a 1, your happiness and satisfaction will come from your work more than from any other source. A 1 would be very successful and intimidating in his career compared to the other numbers due to his will to rule , as well as extremely dangerous if their pride is messed with.

Monday, 25 August 2014

once bitten, twice shy...

I just cant explain why and how I feel this way. I'm happy, yet sad...I'm lonely, but I'm not alone...I'm confused but it feels so good. I hate to say but I'm where I swear I would not return to, I'm breaking every rules I have ever made...Yes, this is love...but I fear to fall in it, because everything that falls gets broken.
I see your pictures, I see Love, My heart goes on a rampage when I see your smile, As you simply craft a smile on your lips, I see delight in them...but as you stretch your arms I gently push it away. As you look into my eyes I turn away brushing of the tears from my eyes. I am pushing you away as I am pushing away my fears. I fear this love, yet I wish for more...I fear to be hurt, yet I savor its anguish. I desired love...but a love built on a strong foundation...not of fear. A love that requires both of us to make it feel whole. I push my chance away with you, but i see promising future with you. so perfect it would seem, yet for the first time I saw in your eyes what I see with mine...fear. We faced the brutality of reality in our own ways...that fear is what keeps us apart. with fear there cant and never will be trust...with fear there could only be pain. I can only see myself in your eyes, I can see the same fears that would take the heart of me. My heart trembles as i would imagine a life without you now...but it gets broken as you walk closer to me. I write this because I know you feel the same....a dream it was cheating our-self with lies. Now I will make the move and push your hands away...though I wish I could hold on to it forever.


...YoGa...

Sunday, 1 June 2014

Parallel Universe

Walking slowly on the shores of blue with our hands together....you, with your beautiful black dress glittering under the moon and me, as poise as I could be to match that beauty....we walked for long. Me with every attempt trying to make you laugh as it was my utter joy hearing those musical laughter. We laughed and
talked for hours both never bored of each other...we sat by the beach allowing the winds to brush our
skins...while you looked up to the skies admiring the stars...I was looking at the brightest one beside me. hair that sits on your shoulder proudly as the wind gently blows them...eyes that glitter brighter then the endless stars above. Gently you rest your head on my shoulder...a shoulder you could always lean on. I continued to stare at your beauty as I gently raised your eyes to meet mine... with only the sound of the waves, under the silver moonlight, with billions of stars above us...I looked into your magnificent eyes lost in love...I said " You are every joy I always longed for, my every dream that made reality...you are the sole reason I am happy...I just want you to know that my heart will always be for you...because I am madly in love with you...I love you" and at that very last word...our lips touched...a magical moment with all barriers of shyness destroyed. We kissed gently with our eyes closed...only to brake apart to give each other a hug. You replied me saying "I love you to" and gave the most beautiful smile that has ever been seen....with a future left ahead for us both...with a world of just you and me...I put my arms around you as we continued our journey.  

...YoGa...

Friday, 30 May 2014

I See You...

Forsaken by thoughts, my mortal soul wondered...through caves and misty mountains yet there was never a purpose for me to tread its journey...there was no journey, there was no path. Aimlessly wondering the world with just false hope... yet
something kept me going? was it that I was to proud to succumb to failure? I did not know yet I walked my sinful path dancing under the rains of the past...seeking only but one thing....Hope. Years has passed and my age has turned its course...no path was shown yet stony rocks and the whispers of dreams. As I fell to my knees realizing the cruel reality of life, as tears poured washing the feet...there was but a sparkle of silver dust below...trembling with joy I raised my head one last time to look up upon my fate...shimmering faintly I saw the light...there it was all along. My silver moon, waiting to carry me when I fall...it illuminated my path as I walked...closer to the end of my journey accepting my end of this world
what I saw was not the gates of heaven...yet it was a Girl...as I stood in shock, a hand reached out to me shining like silver pearls...hair that gracefully sat on her shoulder blowing to the silent wind...a face that glowed like the sun...eyes deeper then the farthest stars....yet her smile....her smile..as it simply curved flawlessly, At that very moment I felt alive all over again, the pain of the past washed away...it was worth every pain this journey lashed against my will. She stood there......Like the
morning sun thy shined upon me comparable to the paradise I see through my deepest dreams. It shines away brightly touching souls with utter joy...angelic grace and flawless posture, With a smile that would smite even the heavens above...a mortal like me could never stood for long against its beauty. Tempted to live a life just to see a glimpse of its beauty...yet fearful to look upon a beauty so mesmerizing. Wishing every moment I would be a tear from those eyes gently flowing down. It was through you, faith was restored that beauty resides...through you the beauty of Gods wonders was known to men. It was through you men's worth was defined...as my thought ran deep, my eyes gazed upon your eyes...such power it held, like the stormy seas that could destroy all, yet there was patience and simplicity in them like the moonlight. As I was lost deep by its
waves...feeling all the hidden pain you shadowed over time Only to realize the smile was to hide the swell of tears buried within those eyes. A purpose was known to me...a chance for me to forever be of need...A promise was made to forever make that smile blossom. For every tear that slips by those smooth skin, a part of my life would be washed away...If i were allowed to...i would keep thy close for the warmth of your presence...not for my own but for the selfish joy of watching your smile...i could live a life bearing those burden cloaked by those eyes...for all that it is....all that you smile..There will forever be this mortal soul wishing your joy and rejoicing by your smile. To let you know that...I see you. :-)
   




...YoGa...            

Wednesday, 23 April 2014

Dreams....

Please show me the way.. Let me see your dream, Come to me...as you behold the true nature of humanity, to unite love beneath a banner of love yet all dreams disappear when the dreamer awakens. It was inevitable that I would meet you on this path, for we share dreams and will learn the conclusion of our endless dreams. Do not falter, dreams lies beyond the horizon, never stop seeking it though its unreachable, for the sake of reality, I had a dream once....I remember that face, I was lying on a pit of an endless expanse of darkness, she approached smiling gently yet she had tears in her eyes hidden. I could see she was happy from the bottom of her heart...happy she found me, so happy that it seemed like it was her, not me that was saved from that pit. Even though I was at the brink of losing hope, that girl was so grateful that it made me jealous. "thank you" she told me, and by saying that i realized, by saving me....it was her she has saved. A dream I have nurtured and held to wishing i could find someone who would feel the same towards me....who would be happy if I was, who i could share my sorrow and joy. but the Demon speaks faintly in my ears - "know the end of your endless dream, me with my greatness will show you the cruel reality" Like all Dreams, i was late to realize it was a mere illusion...a mirage in the never ending desert hungry to thwart my every emotion toward her, She began to sway....her trust swayed silently in the center of darkness. I screamed for her but to my own sorrow none heard...the moon heard my call, in the melody of the moon light i wept as my dreams came crumbling before me. I was counting stars yet lost the moon, yet when I finally found the sun, darkness took over again. I stood helpless as time froze my steps...in your mild and mindless
thoughts you frayed every bit of my heart....my very foundation of hope was torn apart as you were my only hope. Why cant we be one...has time taken us for the better...or has our past made us furious and frightened? Trust....trust...trust, when will it ever be shown from you. have i sinned to great to deserve this from my savior? the one person whom showed me a glimpse of joy then take it back. silently cutting through my wounded heart when you were meant to mend those wounds. I know i have my share of pride...I know I have my share of guilt...but I am Human. I am bound to make mistakes...but mistakes I wish I can regret and to never repeat. My false pride may have carried me high, I was living in my pride alone, who only know what i wish, selfishly rejecting everything i see, only listening to myself and my self alone, But cant you see you broke that with such ease...for before my pride, my love for one is stronger...cant you see the wings i carry has no use before you as we both share the pair...i would only jump high yet land on the same ground, only when your in my arms I could reach the skies, yes! I wont deny...i tried to take the title of a God, trying to be greater then those around me, but the moment my love grew...my wings i shared with you, as i fell deep and felt the depth of my fall. It was worth the fall as sweet anguish it was to fall for one, as I have fallen in love.... When would you realize that all that you dig, you will only find a deep hole with my buried sorrow and evil past that I have tried hard to bury. When would you realize that I am dancing on the edge of this bloodied thorns holding its rose just for you....Do not torment me with what I have thrown aside. Hold me as I would hold you...only then will my greatest dream be reality. 



...YoGa...

  

Thursday, 3 April 2014

Brushing of the past, with HOPE...

Hell yeah!! I was a bad person not worthy of any, but every man has his tale before judgement aroused. Once a man filled with sorrow, and need...need to be loved. Yet all I had was a false image of that fantasy, short yet it was a great run...as all humans will eventually realize their mistakes, I learnt from them. Yet a fear always engulfed the heart...of falling for the same mistakes again. But in love and life it has always been a gamble. The trust and emotions plays the most of them yet is it really our fault? is this mistake really ours to blame or can it be categorized as utter Betrayal? the betrayal of ones trust on that person. I thought for long, and the answer was clear....Hate. the total opposite of love, I learned to hate those who betrayed me, yet i did not seek vengeance, i did not wait for karma...but I know just that there will be a day when they would look upon me and regret their actions.  I have learned to hate....so easily one can be dropped from my ranks as the closest to my lowest. I do not forgive, I do not forget....I drove my anger and consumed my fear....fear of untrustworthy emotions, fear made me Hate the very foundations of humanity.



There's always a day when someone will eventually fuck you up so badly where you wish you could kill them with brick...well I have hurt many out of anger...late to realize that its a waste of effort and only prolonging the problem...but the satisfaction is undeniably GOOD. I became a man who choose to believe in words rather then actions due to my career path, But whats the point of verbally hurting them, when they don't change? let them go, and wash them of your life like they are a piece of garbage. Once a lover who would take a bullet for a girl...yet the bullet came from her itself. There will always be a time when a guy or girl would look back at their phone, see the name of their ex, as every memories of their time together flashes by...close their eyes and with a deep breath delete their ex name. There's this bloody truth about love...no matter how much you hate them, they still linger somewhere in your heart...a manufacturing defect of God himself.  

Yeah! I blame God....I wont deny I stopped believing in him before...I believed in the total opposite. Yes! I welcomed him without realizing the price I had to pay. In my silence and innocence he commanded, "dine with me, and behold I shall take back what has been deprived from you in their insolence shall be yours again forever" words of imaginary speech yet fruitful it was as it helped me realized another mistake. Where there is darkness there is always the light....shimmering in my life yet i walked its path and soon to understand my weakness...I AM HUMAN. I sinned by my lust and anger but i failed to realize there was always good surrounding me...My father, a few of my Good friends who have stood by my pain and suffering. I saw God....he came to me when i left him, he came to me when i was suffering, He came to me when i was finally beaten, he came to me even when I hated him, He came to me in the form of HOPE. 

Hope...it is the very foundation of being a human...no, it is hope that we life on. Hope of living, loving, caring, hope of humanity.....he showed it to me with the very reason i became a monster, He allowed me to sin, he allowed me to hate, he allowed me to curse and be filled with evil...knowing the day will come when I would fall on my knees again, he showed me the light where there was only darkness...he showed me my mistakes. He showed me my hope to move on and start fresh...He allowed me to wonder like a lost sheep without its shepherd, but he found me. He gave me all the worst, and he gave me the best when he thought i really deserved it. Yeah, he is there...God, he lives in everyone, he gave us the choice to choose in what we believe, good or bad, we are the reflection of god as he created us in his image, we can
choose to kill or choose to heal, he lives in us and does wonders through us.

A life i led once came crashing down, I was ignorant of  my ambition, my family and my life...irresponsible. It was a turning point for me after falling right down deep, and I stood back up...because I saw the light. thought I haven't reached it, i hope i will one day. I realized how futile it was to hate love itself...it always shows its way back into you...I began to love another. Only then i realized i could forgive the people for the betrayal they have done...because in the end...i am the winner, I loved a better person...I became the better man, I could forgive them for making me the man i am today, with all mistakes and dreams realized. I am proud to say what I was...because what i am now it beyond comparable to what i was. I grasped my ambition and lived my dreams, I flew where none could reach...i flew where those who betrayed my trust cant imagine. for me that's the greatest punishment they deserve...to watch someone they put down so bad live a happy life without them. Now that is sweet revenge....


Life in my eyes is simple...As we are humans, me are bound to make the wrong choices and make mistakes...stand back up...learn and never lose hope. Forgive those who betray you, trust me its not worth your time even thinking about them, Betrayal leaves scars in your life, but scars that only make you stronger...Learn to love and live life....enjoy all the wonders life can give you. Do what you can to make those dear to you closer...because life is short, we life once, why not live a great one with no regrets.

I wrote this to remind my self of who I was, my mistakes and my past and how i brushed my past to what I have become....to stay true to my words.


....YoGa....

Wednesday, 5 March 2014

You and Me....

I burn to make you understand how time invaded this life now filled with intense love...yet one wrong word and it all may come crashing down for our fates are envious and  filled with distant past and insecurities.
They envy you your dreams, so they'll let you drown

there is no answer why, there is no how, it's like the overpowering waves of the ocean, waiting to engulf us in sorrow... But we are here right now, with all dreams realized...knowing our fate we chose to gamble for our love has conquered all. What would we choose with still more time to do is still a question to be answered, we cant fall down when it's time to arise for No-one else can heal our wounds

When I was crying for my fears, bitter tears, But you made me see we're crazy running...Crazy running like we're running out of time. When what's real becomes just another source of hurt And when meaning's gone from every word rushing headlong without a second thought Out where reality awaits, I choose to fantasize and build myself another piece of this memory...a memory of lies where my hungry desire awoke...but it all found oblivion
In your embrace, all mistakes forgiven in your embrace...all the pain and fears washed away with one touch of an angel.

Once again taboo becomes our law, What we want seems taken by fate dwindling down a one way road turning
Away from our imaginary flower field where we used to lay beneath the sky, riding dreams together.

though bathed in fear, I'm just looking to live to learn how to live, Slowly starting to see it's me I will need to forgive because it seems like I'm stuck here between what I know and what I cannot know now
With too many choices of which way to go....You had the smile enough to pierce my guard and to take my soul off to faraway fantasy making a make believe world filled with just us and our never ending love. You told me I'll never be alone, cos you're right there

But this life ain't, it ain't for me alone and here I thought I could keep it for myself forsaken by my own solitude and shadows but you sliced the light right off my sun,We took a gamble with this love, like sailing through the storm with the waves rushing over to take us, we were battling against the tides, You were my beacon of salvation, I was your starlight, though I'd see it for myself yet The bigger the words. the greater the believe.... to Hold on to what we believe in...LOVE.

Your love came racing down my spine like a storm on my skin, With shaking hands, I'll guide your sweet kiss into my lips...gently savoring every moment of it with tenderness until I feel you within
And I know, I know that it's all about understanding
I know love is hidden inside your beautiful soul as it's crying
For love to conquer the day slowly dawning
I want you to know your fears have nothing on my reality for I'm high on the scent of your skin
I know we're riding endlessly into the sky, feel the life deep within for my love for you runs deep within my heart pierced for an eternity of just......You and ME.






...YoGa...